Blessings

God is so good. Sometimes it seems more evident that He is good, but He is always good, all the time. Right now in my life God's goodness is especially evident - I just got engaged!!

Chris and I are ecstatic about the great things God has done to bring us together. We were engaged on Sunday after church :) He walked me around outside church "looking for good spots to take pictures". We stopped in the courtyard in the middle of the church and he dropped to one knee and asked me to marry him! (Of course I said yes)

Our wedding will be on June 5th, 2010, and we cannot wait to see what kind of wonderful things God has in store for our life together : ) More details to come, including a link to our wedding website. YAY!!

Disorganitis

That is the name of the disease I suffer from. I have terminal, fatal, absolutely incurable and destructive disorganitis. I can't keep track of anything, I lose half of my possessions. I pile things up until I can't stand it, and then I can't find anything in the chaos. People try to help me, offer advice, give me ideas and suggestions, and they work for about a day. And then they don't work for more than that day... and I'm back to being disorganized to death. I am literally stressed out beyond all reason about this. I'm losing important things, missing deadlines because stuff gets covered up... I don't know what to do!

This pretty much stinks.

Wow, such a long time...

A thousand apologies for the complete lack of updating on my part. The summer turned out to be crazier than I thought it would be, and I didn't have time to update facebook AND a blog, so I just updated FB. Horrible? Perhaps. Bottom line from the summer of working camp:
GOD IS ENOUGH. No really, He is! I saw God work in so many amazing ways, through kids, through counselors, through fellow staff members, through parents and younger siblings, through volunteers, through music, through Creation... it was by far one of the most amazing experiences of my life. I will never forget my summer with WinShape Camps C3!!

Since the summer, I've gotten back into the swing of teaching life again. This year is going better, considering I had a much better idea of what to expect as I came into the year. I have four classes of freshmen, and starting with a clean slate has been fantastic with them. None of them know I was too nice last year... ha! I do have two classes of students from last year, and that's a challenge. But God is teaching me to love them even when it feels like they're my enemies (which is, like, every day...)

As to what God is teaching, oh my goodness, where to start? Patience is the newest and most relevant one (to be explained later...) He continues to show me just how powerful and AMAZING his grace really is. We could never deserve it, never earn it, never understand it, He just keeps dumping it out on us every day to excess. What a great God!!

Speaking of pouring out blessings, there's also a new blessing in my life, and his name is Chris :) for some reason, God saw fit to bring this great man of God into my life unexpectedly this summer while I was at camp. After about a month of talking via email and phone, we met in person and well, the rest is history. I'm only happier when I'm fellowshipping with my Savior, if that clears it up! I don't deserve someone so kind and level-headed and practical, and AWESOME as he is, but that's how God works, isn't it? Once we finally let go of those things we think are so precious, and just trust Him to bring us whatever it is He wants, we get something SO AMAZING we couldn't have ever imagined it! So cool :)

So apologies again for the delay in updating. Chris is actually the one who told me I should update, so thank him for this post! Much love to everyone, and I pray God's richest blessings over your lives!!

Almost there!!

Wow, I can hardly believe that 3 days from now I'll be on my way up to Berry to start training week for camp. This is going to be a fantastic adventure, and I am SO excited! But I'm also starting to get a little anxious. About what? Well, there's packing, there's meeting my team members, there's planning out track times, set lists, worship practices, staying focused on Jesus while lovign kids all summer and trying to keep up with my Master's, too!! ......... I certainly can't do all of it on my own. This is going to take the sustenance and grace of the Lord Jesus Christ EVERY MOMENT of EVERY DAY to make this work. And as scary as it sounds, that is the PERFECT place to be :)

So for those of you who are still a little unclear on it, here's a link to the WinShape camps website. If it doesn't come straight up to the C3 website, be sure to click the little "C3" tag. Watch the video, read the info... it's awesome what we're about to go do. I am so jazzed about WinShape's vision for this camp and how to reach communities through these camps. It's so much more than just fun. God is gonna do HUGE things!

More about C3 camp

FAQs:
*What exactly are you doing personally?
Well my official title for my team is "Worship Leader," but that doesn't mean I'm the female version of Chris Tomlin. No, that just means I'm the one playing guitar and singing the melody most of the time :) I get the awesome privilege of playing with 3 guys in a band and helping kids learn how to praise Jesus, as well as just being a servant leader for the other folks on my team. I'm super pumped.

*Where are you going?
My team is going to 9 cities total. I'll be able to join them at 7 of those locations (sadly, I have to leave after week 7 for some more adventures back at the homestead getting ready for school next year). Here is a list of those locations!
Week/Dates City

June 8-12 Ft. Worth, TX

June 15-19 Lafayette, LA

June 22-26 Tifton, GA

June 29-July 3 Pasadena, TX

July 6-10 Broken Arrow, OK

July 13-17 Germantown, TN

July 20-24 Plano, TX

July 27-31 Lake Charles, LA

Aug. 3-7 Killeen, TX

* How can I pray for you and your team?
Great question! We would greatly appreciate your prayers, as would the other C3 and boys'/girls camp teams! You can pray for safe travel, good health, unity among our team, for the Holy Spirit to go before us and do mighty things, for protection from the little things the Enemy would do (equipment mess-ups, budget break-downs, you name it) to defame the name of Christ, and for kids and their parents to come to know Jesus!! That's probably not even everything, but it's a start. Thanks in advance!


Be sure to check back in with my blog, I'll be updating and posting pictures whenever I can!
Blessings and hugs,
KP :)

It's time for an adventure!

Well hello all! It's been quite a while since I last blogged, I know. I mean, I've just been sitting around doing nothing, so I don't know why I haven't gotten to it... ;) Okay we all know THAT'S not true. It has been CRAZY getting to the end of the year!! But here we are - finals this week and then the kids are out, I do the post-planning thing, and that's it for my first year of teaching! WOW!!

I can't believe that it's already pretty much over. It just flew by. It feels like yesterday I was sitting in my classroom scared beyond all reason about my kids coming in the next week, and we've already finished up our year together. I pray I have made a difference, made a positive impact... I pray they'll remember something! Hopefully the math sticks, and some organizational skills stick, and some vocabulary, and some math history... but more than that, I hope they become better people because of the little bit of time I spent with them. If it happens, it is ONLY because God in his Holy Spirit worked through me this year, it is certainly not because of anything I did. Because oh boy, did I mess up a lot!

I have learned SO much this year. I now know how NOT to manage a classroom, how NOT to handle guided study, how NOT to assign projects, how NOT to take up cell phones and iPods (or rather how TO)... so many things I did wrong, but I can learn from them and turn it around next year. At one point this year I was doing some soul-searching about teaching and thinking gosh, I just can't do this job. I mean I can do the teaching part, but the administrating and the organizing and the accounting and all else, I can't handle that... maybe I should do camp or something all the time that I enjoy and can do better at. And God has gently reminded me over the past few weeks just how his Kingdom works. He doesn't pick the people who are good at things to go do things they're good at. He picks people who AREN'T good at things to go do those very things, so that when something good comes from it, HE gets the glory. That's what He's doing in my life, right now, in this teaching journey. And when I think about it like that, I want to boast all the more about my weaknesses! (2 Corinthians 12: 9-10) So bring on the tough stuff. I openly confess that I don't know how to do it, can't do it, and won't be able to do it on my own. Great :) that gives God LOTS of room to do BIG THINGS!! (sweet)

Another place God has the chance to show up big is starting the WinShape Camp. In case any of you don't know, I'm going to be leading worship for a 1st-6th grade kids camp this summer called WinShape C3. yes, that's the Chick-fil-A WinShape I'm referring to, but my camp isn't up at Berry all summer. I'll be moving around with my team to 7 cities (they'll do 9, but I have to miss the last two :( *cry* ) around the U.S. We'll be doing a day camp, partnering with local churches and chick-fila's to bring the good news of Jesus to communities all over. I'm SO pumped! The scary parts: 1) I head off to camp the very next day after post-planning is over. 2) I'll be playing with a band of guys who are awesome I'm sure, we just won't get to practice like, at all.... I'm sure there's more to be scared about, like staying healthy and not losing my voice, finding some way to eat right while we're out at restaurants all the time... the list goes on.

But God is good and I can't WAIT to see what He's going to do through all this. I'll keep everybody posted (probably via this blog, isn't that what it's for?) and let you know how things are going. Pictures of kids are always fun, too :)

OH YEAH I started my maste'rs degree online. That's right, I'll be doing summer camp AND summer school online. What was I thinking? Apparently too much at once... like always =D.

That's all for now!! Hugs and blessings,
KP

WOW...

I had an unusual experience today. It was not bad, it was rather good, actually! Here goes...

For the first time in a long time, I really enjoyed work today. I was totally excited about the material I was going over, totally excited about seeing and spending time with my kids, and just especially positive and encouraging. It can ONLY be the Holy Spirit pouring through me to those I teach and serve. WOW! It was so great, THANK YOU JESUS for such a great day!

On several occasions, I felt like I was having an out-of-body experience, and just marveling at the enthusiasm I had for the kids and especially for the math I was teaching. At one point today during tutoring, a student presented a problem I wasn't sure how to do. And then all of a sudden all of this math knowledge just came flooding out of me... I don't know where it came from, except Jesus!! SWEET!!! I mean, how cool is that?

I finally got a glimpse, a sweet taste, of what it is like to "walk in the Spirit" at work. I have been struggling with what that looks like, feels like, sounds like. I've wondered how I make that happen. But I DON'T make it happen. I can't contribute it to a fantastic quiet time this morning, or a wonderful experience at church last night or anything... just the Spirit's presence on me, all day. It was unbelievable.

I pray that we can all have that feeling at some point; of God just FLOWING through us and doing what we can't. Yay!

Vision

I just spent the weekend in Orlando, Florida with the leadership team from WinShape Camps getting ready for camp this summer. It was an extremely fun, extremely PRODUCTIVE weekend, as well as very exciting. I am SO PUMPED for camp right now, it's not even funny. I keep wishing that time would fast-forward and I could be at camp now... that I didn't have to leave camp early to fulfill my other obligations...
that camp was my job.......

The vision of WinShape Camps and Connect Ministries, the two groups partnering to make this camp a reality, is unreal. They painted such vivid pictures of camp and what they want to convey and put forth, that it's almost as if I had already seen it. I can picture in my mind what a day should look like. I can't wait to be there!! I love thinking about, preparing for, getting excited about, camp. And it makes me wonder -

If doing camp makes me this happy, this fired-up, would it be possible to do it for a living? I don't know what that looks like, or how it would happen, but I just know that this weekend and the prospect of getting ready for camp was the brightest spot in the past few months. I was doing something I enjoyed, without frustration. Aren't we supposed to do what we love as our job, if possible?

Only God knows what His plans are for me. He will reveal His plan in time. I guess I'm just restless, or over-thinking. But maybe..... maybe I'm not....

Settling In...

So I've been teaching for about eight months now, and I am finally starting to feel somewhat settled. Sure, there are still moments that I freak out and don't know what I'm doing, but at the end of the day when all is said and done, those moments don't color the way I feel about my job. Which I think is great.

I am starting to look forward to next year instead of dreading it, starting to enjoy getting up and going to work, instead of not wanting to do it (other than the whole waking up at 5 thing, that will never feel good lol). I am very thankful for my friends at work and at church and I'm just enjoying life right now! It's awesome.

I am also very excited to be house-sitting and dog-sitting for a friend of mine right now! Me and Punkin (the dog) are just hangin out, playin with toys, eatin Kix cereal :) So fun!

Finally, I can't wait until tomorrow night at Grace singles group because we've got a joint meeting with other singles groups, and I am helping lead worship! Should be super SHWEET. Yay singing for Jesus!

Well I'm off to play with Punkin some more and write a goals statement for grad school. Oh yeah, you heard me right - the Masters degree begins! Maybe May 4th?? More to come...

Long time...

It's been a long time since my last post!  Sorry about that... It is hard to put into words how busy my last few weeks have been.  And not that it's really any better right now, I guess I"m just getting caught up a bit!  Which is nice :) 

As every day passes, I am realizing more and more that I am truly built to teach Middle School.  It's crazy, I know, but I just love 'em!  So, we'll see how God works that out in the coming years!  In the meantime, I'm trying to let God work through me to be the best high school teacher I can be right now!

God is so good.  He has really blessed me with encouragement in the past few weeks when I have needed it so desperately.  I am so thankful to friends and family for the prayers and to my Lord and Savior for continuing to be AWESOME!!

I don't really have a whole lot else to say.  I've been trying to go to bed earlier, and I want to keep that up tonight too!  

Do you ever...

...sit somewhere, discontented, and wish you were somewhere else?

...wish your life were different?

...wonder why you're not making a difference?

...wonder why you can't feel God or just can't seem to get it right?

...count the days, the hours, the minutes, the seconds.....

Do you ever?

every day is an adventure... or is it?

Well I traveled to Athens yesterday to visit with some friends and have had a wonderful time. This morning I got to fellowship with Melissa, who is such an encouragement!! It was so great, because in sharing what God was teaching us individually, He touched the other person, both ways. So neat!

I was talking with her about how in teaching, every day is an adventure. I never know what to expect... even though I plan, I can't know for sure how the lessons are going to go, what kind of mood the kids will be in, how that will affect MY mood, what kind of paperwork I might have forgotten to do (yikes!), etc. It gets tough! As I was formulating the words to share with Melissa about how every day is an adventure, God spoke to me. Literally, right there, riding in her car, while I had words hanging out of my mouth, God whispered in my ear (well, my heart's ear). I stopped talking and, since I had no paper, pulled out my cell phone and saved a draft text with the words of the message I had just gotten. I had to ask Melissa to wait a minute so I could get it all down! Here is what it said:

"You don't have to wonder what each day will be like... Start out by orienting your mind on me, and plan to spend the entire day there, with that attitude. Let nothing and no one steal your joy!!!"

I read this out loud, and we were both awestruck. Every day doesn't have to be an adventure! Now, let's make clear that, with Christ, each day is a journey, a new experience in following Christ, and has its own challenges and excitements. That doesn't change. But, every day does not have to be a plethora of uncertainties, frought with hardship and struggle because you don't know what's coming next or where your emotions are going or how other people are going to affect you. If your aim is not to please people or follow your emotions, but to seek to please Christ and follow Him, you won't face all those treacherous parts of an uncertain adventure!!

Isn't that reassuring? That's what God wanted me to know today, and maybe He wants you to know it, too. You don't have to spend the day wondering. You don't have to accept that every day is a rollercoaster. I want to learn how to set my mind on Christ in the morning, to trust Him all day, to rest in His joy, letting NOTHING steal it. I want to learn how to take every thought, every MOMENT, captive for Christ! Like Paul said in 2 Corinthians 10:4-5,

"The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."

That's so cool. When a day can be like that, who would want an uncertain adventure?!

Lord Jesus, teach me to trust you. Teach me to lean on your everlasting arms every second of every day; to press hard to know you, that you would respond and grant me joy, peace, and grace, for every moment I face, no matter what the challenges may be. I pray you would help me see that you are there every second. Help me learn how to take every thought captive for Christ, fighting with your weapons, not mine! Lord Jesus, I love you, and I praise you and thank you for revealing yourself to me through this simple Truth. Help me put it into practice, by your precious Holy Spirit and by the power of the shed blood of Jesus on the cross. In His name I ask these things... Let it be.

I pray it for you, too :)

Earth in the Window: a study of Focus

So this post is a bit random, but I think it's gonna make at least a little bit of sense. I have discovered as I've grown older that I have a hard time staying focused. And not just in any particular situation... Need some examples? Okay sure, I'm glad you asked.

Well, first of all, there's the social ADD I have (thanks for the term, Liza!) When I get around a lot of people I can get off topic SOO easily, and I'm one of the most easily distracted people I know (if you've spent any time with me, you're nodding your head right now). I even do it when I'm teaching. I'll forget where I was in conversation, forget the end of a story or joke! It's crazy! It's like I'm focused one minute and all of a sudden, I'm not.

Need another example? Okay. How about starting things, like crafts, projects, books, movies, etc... but never finishing them? I'm focused on them for some amount of time but then I get distracted or busy with something else, and my focus shifts! I have piles, mounds, boxes full of unfinished projects and books from my distracted past...

Then there's spiritually! I'm sure we can all relate to this at one time or another, but I'll have a day, a week, a month, where I'm really focused on the Lord every day, spending time with Him, growing in my relationship, and then I lose the focus and get distracted by the busyness of life, by other things, other people... I feel bad, because Jesus is the greatest thing in the universe! How on EARTH could I think about ANYTHING else above Him?? Because I'm still trapped in a human body and I think with a sinful, human brain. It's going to happen, but should it happen so much? Isn't there more than just being focused for a while, and then not focused for the next while?

I think of a few verses, like Colossians 3:1-3, "Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God." Set your hearts, set your minds. A.k.a., FOCUS.

Here's another one, a very powerful scripture for me, Philippians 4:8, "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." FOCUS.

I often think about losing my spiritual just like when I get distracted in a group of people - something catches my eye and I turn away, mentally, emotionally, even physically, and I am no longer looking at or focusing on, the person I was talking to, or the thing I was doing, or GOD. But in college, I heard (or read, I can't remember, but Bethany I'm associating you with it!)

Remember the movie, Apollo 13? These guys went on a mission to the moon but they never made it due to a malfunction with their ship ("Houston, we have a problem.") At one point they are trying to navigate themselves and because their power is so low, they can't turn any systems on to help navigate. So someone figures out (Houston or the crew) that if they can just keep Earth in the little triangular window of the ship, they will be on track. So they fight to keep the Earth in the window. Due to natural forces like gravity, turbulance, etc, they have a hard time keeping the Earth in the window - it slips, it moves, they struggle, but eventually, Earth gets back in that window.

It's such a beautiful analogy of our relationship with Christ. Most of the time, we aren't jumping out of the spaceship, we aren't turning around to head back to our doom, we haven't fallen asleep in the hull of the ship and ignored any need to do anything, no... we just have to work at keeping the Earth in the window. Or in this case, keeping the Cross at the forefront of everything we think, see, and do. When it slips, it is not because we stink at being Christians.. it's because natural forces are pulling on us!

Distraction happens. Don't beat yourself up. Just get Earth back in the window and "set your mind on things above."

life is a highway

So I think I need to make more road trips. Long ones, not just an hour or less, but like 2, 3, 4 hours. Why? Because my drives to and from Augusta in the last couple days really were more like Journeys with God. Lots of emotions, lots of pretty scenery, lots of music, lots of prayer. Fantastic.

I guess I don't spend enough alone time where my mind is focused. I spend a lot of it vegging and doing nothing, but no, that doesn't do it. Something about driving, when my mind is actually paying attention and I have lots of free time to just talk to God and listen, it's really great. PLUS, I got to spend hours just listening to the music on my iPod. I had forgotten how much of a healing effect music has on me...

God used each trip to reveal something new to me (or remind me of something old so it became new again). So wonderful... well there's that.

In other news, the wedding was SOO BEAUTIFUL!! There was hardly a dry eye in the house, it was a very sweet and beautiful wedding. Ben and Brittany love each other SOO much and it's so very clear. Their families mesh very well and were very welcoming to me and everyone else. I had fun meeting some new people, eating some yummy food, and spending some time in a new town! (Yay Evans/Augusta/Martinez!) Oh, and buying a new dress and wearing it and looking really perty :) that was fun too!

I'm so glad I got to be a part of the special day. During the reception, I started reflecting a bit, since I had no one to dance with and was rather bored... Two more of my friends are now married. I'm sure tons more are going to get married or engaged soon, and it's just a little lonesome every now and then. In an emotional girl moment, it finally hit me, as everyone was pairing up on the dance floor, that I had no one there with me and I felt really lonely. That wasn't very fun. So that was one of the things me and God talked about in the car ride home, and that got better. Yay!

I've been trying to write this post for like an hour and I'm getting nowhere new, I'm gonna sign off now.

First days... for the second time

So we started back again. It's going pretty well, I'm having fun and enjoying being back. My classes keep going by faster or slower than I planned! I have so much laid out for us to do and then we don't finish, or we finish WAY too early and I have nothing else!

Guess in time I'll learn how to always have enough on hand to do, eh?

If We Are the Body...

So I had a revelation today, after a heartbreaking experience and a long talk with my two best friends. It kind of a re-revelation, but that's not the point. Here is the point:

Go to almost any church and visit a college or young adults class/service/gathering/whatever, and you are likely to see a trend... No one will talk to you.
If you are lucky enough to come with someone, they will often walk you around and introduce you, but sometimes not... If you go to a group and know someone there, that is helpful but sometimes not reliable, because they may or not even talk to you, much less introduce you to other people.
If you come alone... GOOD LUCK.

We get soo caught up in our own little worlds and our own little groups of friends that we fail to notice new people in the room. In the building. In the world...
You see, I have heard (and believe it to be infallibly true) that college [and I add pre-career young adulthood] is THE most self-centered time in your life. (I'm not saying everyone this age is self-centered, let me finish.)

When you're in college, you are focusing on stepping out on your OWN, become your OWN person, meeting your OWN needs, deciding on YOUR major, making YOUR new friends, paying for your OWN stuff (sometimes, lol). Deciding on YOUR career, YOUR mate, YOUR future.....
discovering YOUR personality, YOUR needs, YOUR wants, YOUR likes, YOUR dislikes, and wanting to find/finding and marrying someone who makes YOU happy... As I mentioned before, everyone in college and young adulthood is NOT selfish. That's not what I'm saying. Neither is seeking God's will for your life in your career and marriage and everything else a bad thing, it is a very good thing actually. But it IS a self-centered time in our lives. Think about all the things I just listed... am I wrong?

Here is the question, though. If we are becoming, in college and early adulthood, the people we will be for the rest of our lives (as our elders tell us is true, and we should believe them because well, they already did it, why would they all lie), why do we want to develop habits focused on ourselves? Isn't that just going to turn us into self-centered adults, older adults, senior adults, and finally, selfish dead people who show up in heaven (or elsewhere) surprised when it's not all about us?? Should we not, rather, be working on living outward? I'm not saying go help other people find their callings and don't look for your own. Or help all your friends get married but don't find love yourself. No. That's dumb. What am I saying, then?

I believe, with God's help, it is possible for us to live lives that LOVE other people more than we love ourselves (hey, that sounds familiar... oh wait, Jesus said to do that...) As we are going through classes and jobs and dates/mates and church groups and what not, it has to be possible to still find God's will for our individual lives, but live for his global purpose. It HAS to be possible! In any one given moment, is taking five minutes out of my day to be nice to someone REALLY going to ruin my future? Probably not. If I'm the only Jesus that person ever SEES, could it ruin THEIR future? Quite possibly. Which is scarier?

Here's the other thing: if we can't even be nice to other Christian people at church, how in the WORLD do we plan to be nice to someone who believes something different than us? We probably won't... And besides - how do we know that person walking into our sunday school class, singles group, worship service, bible study, fellowship, meeting, whatever ... is truly a believer anyway? Our acts of selfishness and failure to make that person feel LOVED and WELCOME could very well turn that person away from church and from God for weeks, months, years, a lifetime... Oh God, I pray I have not been responsible for any alienation such as this!!

I confess that I have been the self-absorbed person, yes indeed. It STILL happens to me, I admit it! But I pray that God would help CHANGE that in me, and give me an OUTWARD lifestyle, rather than an INWARD one. That's how Jesus lived. And I wanna be like Him.

Back to it..

Well we had planning today. I got a great deal of stuff done, but not everything I needed to do. My DREAM planning day would have gone like this:

1) Clean ALL the papers off my desk
2) Go through and organize papers from last semester
3) Move furniture
4) Plan first week for all three preps (including creating notes and homework assignments for all three preps)
5) Getting all my copies made - ALLL of them
6) Setting out schedules for first period (in seating chart order)
7) Make seating charts for all six classes
8) Hang up first period sheet for guided study (too bad I can't find it...)

Now, how much of that actually got done? Part of #3, part of #4, part of #5. That's it. BOO!

Oh well, it was still a productive day. And believe it or not, once I was there and around my co-workers I enjoyed being back at work. I work with a great crew of folks :) I don't know if any of us feel ready for Monday, or not, but I DEFINITELY don't!! Hope it goes okay...